It’s Raining Love. A John Cusack Joint.

September 10, 2010 at 11:02 am (Uncategorized) ()

I think about falling in love every day.

As I write that statement, I know certain friends of mine are guffawing their hearts out, thinking to themselves, “You do not, stop being a dramatic emotional rag a muffin.” To them I say, “Shut it babydoll, It’s Chinatown!” Men think about love too, it’s not just for women anymore. I don’t think about who I’m going to fall in love with since I fall in love all the time. Receptionist in the lobby that smiled at me. Love You. Barista at Coffee Bean that told me to have a nice day. Love You. Homeless person with a 6 finger wool mitten on one hand and holding a crushed can of Tecate in the other. Conditionally love you based on you trading that Tecate can in for a Bud Light Can.

Recycle American.

I think about where I’m going to fall in love all the time. The physical location of where I will meet someone. I almost never think of the “who”. Even though I probably should start thinking about someone who would actually embrace a 5’8″ Indian man who is sometimes witty and likes to wear $5 t-shirts that are purchased from discount stores. It’s called being thrifty, not cheap. We all want to fall in love even if you’re a curmudgeon that doesn’t believe in love anymore since your ex told you she was “taking a trip”, but really was going on permanent holiday. From you.

HR is going to be upset at the vacation accrual.

I don’t know the point I started thinking about exact places I would meet someone, but I’m pretty sure it started in college when I asked out Jocelyn. I went home so excited that I got a number of this beautiful girl that I started dreaming of holding hands and drinking $2 drafts (domestic, not import. The work-study program did not make me rich enough for non-American brews, but it did make me intoxicated on Friday and Saturday nights. Oh, and don’t forget about Thirsty Thursdays, Senior Sundays, and Wacky Wasted Women Wednesdays. College bars love alliteration) and telling people that we met at the gym. It would be glorious! The gym. Oh, how we would eat tuna fish sandwiches on the quad while soaking in the sun and listening to the sweet sounds of some pathetic loser playing “Santeria” on his acoustic guitar trying to get chicks. I already had a chick, sucker! I picked up the phone to start living this dream. Love will overcome!

She never called back.

I think about specific locations where love takes place more than anyone knows. I think about it a dozen times a day. Thousands of times a year. When I walk to work I wonder if that girl with her Pomeranian and that guy with his golden retriever are meeting for the first time because their dogs like licking each other’s butts. Then they’ll go on a date and have their dogs be ring bearers at their wedding because that’s just what dogs do. Sometimes, I don’t even know how I got to work because I’m daydreaming of running into a girl at the library, apologizing, and picking up her books and touching hands that lead to romance. Then I realize life isn’t a Nicholas Sparks novel. Or that I ever go to the library which throws a major Gorilla wrench into this daydream. But why can’t we dream? Why can’t we believe that we’ll fall in love with someone, madly run to their apartment (would I fall in love with someone who owned a house? Jackpot), tell them how we feel, only to have it rain and walk away thinking we blew it, but having that other person run after you and tell you they feel the same as you? You know who loved that previous sentence? John Cusack. Just mentioning rain and love in the same scenario triggers a kickback fee in his life contract.

Agent – “John, some poor over-romantic sap mentioned raining and telling some girl that you love them on some dumb blog no one reads.”

Cusack – “Cha, mother f’in, ching. Keep making fun of me while I roll on this pile of money. Middle fingers in the air!”

In the end we’re all hopeful romantics and put me in that group, I’m not ashamed. We’re not hopeless. Hopeless would indicate that we know we are never getting that happy ending in a non-Asian massage parlor way. Or maybe in an Asian massage parlor way. Sometimes we need a release, I don’t discriminate. You do you. The past few months I’ve started dreaming big, believing that something good will happen, which is a big transformation from my glass is always empty philosophy. I know I will fall down, be rejected, and deal with disappointment and I am ready. I heard this great motto once, “It’s not how many times you fall that matters, it’s how many times you need to buy new pants from falling so much because eventually all that falling is going to take a toll on your wallet and you’re not going to want to fall anymore.”

Why does Anonymous always have the greatest sayings?!!? Does he have a Facebook page?

The time to dream is now. Maybe one day I’ll run into Jocelyn and we’ll laugh and talk and then I’ll dump her because it’s called revenge. Wait, that has nothing to do with love. Let’s do that over. What I meant was that we’ll fall in love, hold hands, finally have those tuna fish sandwiches and laugh about me dumping her after she never called back. That’s better.

Or maybe I’ll just start buying import beers. Love is international.

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14 Comments

  1. Junket said,

    When I am drunk(ish), Santeria is my favorite song. The more you know, Rahul. Peach out.

    • Rahul said,

      Millions of peaches. Peaches for me. Millions of peaches, why are there so many peaches?

  2. Liz said,

    I agree about Anonymous always having the best quote. That guy is splendid.

  3. lbluca77 said,

    Falling in love is fun. Especially when you are falling in love with a gallon of mint n chip ice cream.

    • Rahul said,

      That’s impossible. Ice cream doesn’t have a heart.

  4. laurenne said,

    I really want to hug you right now, Rahulio.
    This makes me realize that you are a sexy sensitive sap.

    I’m gonna give you some free dating advice right here. Free….

    Ready?

    Stop eating tuna fish sandwiches.
    Your breath probably stinks.
    Jocelyn was probably all, ‘That guy was cute but he had fish breath.’

    That is all.

    • Rahul said,

      That advice right there is why I let you eat all my pita. That could go one of two ways.

  5. Bradshaw said,

    Santeria used to be my text message ringtone. And international beers are tasty. Those Germans, man, they do beer right.

    • Rahul said,

      What about those English beers though? All warm and have horrible teeth.

  6. Lindsay said,

    Did you grow up with sisters? Or in a romantic-comedy friendly home ?

    • Rahul said,

      No sisters. Just an extremely emotional mom that loves Bollywood movies. And Sleepless in Seattle.

  7. That Girl said,

    I haven’t blogged in almost a year… I also haven’t read any blogs…

    I’m back and I’m so glad that you’re still blogging… guess what? I still love you!

    =) That Girl

    • Rahul said,

      YES! Love for everyone! Especially John Cusack.

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